Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
