im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.