And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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