After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
