Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
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