Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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