Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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