This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
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Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
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A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize