My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize