I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
