i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
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