the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
