Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
one might say we're banned from that church
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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