Got a toothbrush?
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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