according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
pray to the hookup gods
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
