he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
