508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I skipped work to stalk him.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
