It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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