I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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