I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
