Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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