I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
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he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
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Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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