I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize