Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize