fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
