omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize