I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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