If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
