chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I'm passing your future prison.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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