why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
