So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize