THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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