singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
