Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
