Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
there is puke in my bra ... again
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