You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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