We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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