I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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