I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
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I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
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He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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