I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
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