so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
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