Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
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Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house