How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
then he tried to convert me to islam
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
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