Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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