i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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