i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
