i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
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