She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
