Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
As shirtless as possible
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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