Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
