No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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